I have this thing when people don’t return my calls or texts. I know it’s not the truth or real, but, my mind still thinks it is no matter what I tell it. I don’t really know how to make it go away, so I’m going to try to write about it.
Now that I think about it, I think it happens if someone gives me a certain look, needs to get off the phone when I am talking, or has a certain tone. I think it happens alot.
So here goes……..
Let’s say I send an email to someone and they don’t respond. I think the following:
They don’t like me
I shouldn’t have sent it
I’m annoying them
I need to avoid them in the future
They don’t want to play with me (5 years old on the playground)
Those are the majors. Even though if I don’t respond to someone it’s usually because:
I’m in a hurry and don’t have time
it sunk below the line because I got too many emails that day and I can no longer see it
I wanted to address it in a real way but couldn’t on my phone cause it’s too hard to type on those little letters
I hit it so it didn’t look new anymore and so I didn’t notice that I hadn’t responded
Do those reasons have anything to do with how I feel about the person? No. (Unless they are soliciting me and I didn’t ask them to and it’s spam or something, but it’s still not personal to how I feel about the person).
OK, that was easy. I can now see that it’s not personal at all for me.
If I really want the person to respond, I can send another email and another one, etc. until they either tell me to stop or they respond.
Wow. That is totally a miracle for me. Really good.
Another thing I used to hide about myself was that sometimes I got upset. I thought that you always had to look happy. I thought that if people saw me get upset they couldn’t love me.
A wise person asked me what I thought about someone if they got upset.
Good question. I felt honored that they would share their real self with me and closer to them because of it.
Oh. I said. Wow!!! That really put another spin to it. And I gave that one up then.
Sharing is a great access to freedom for me. Sometimes I forget when I’m stuck, but more and more I have been getting into dialogue instead of staying in my crazy little mind, and I have to say, it allows me to Create Life Out Here in a really great way.
Thanks for listening. I feel much better. I hope you do, too!!!!!